Sunday, November 02, 2003

you so gotta love yourself.

U.G.L.Y-->u gotta love yourself. i have that mindset in life, so people, if you detest my ego-loving self, go away already! heh. k, soz now i am left with that level amaths retest and olevel malay which happens on the same day. *loosens collar and gulps the way cartoons do*. gotta practice amaths every single day for a minimum of an hour for each session. heh. semangat.. geez. suddenly the kemelayuan in me starts to build up these days cos daddy won't lemme live one day without reading the papers. sometimes i end up staring at the obituaries and get myself amazed on how long or short each person lived and guessed their profession and stuff. heh. at least i "read" the papers. bleahz. my higher malay marks are going down and daddy certainly do not like it cos he's a malay journalist and his children are supposed to speak good malay and stuff. but its not my fault i am immune to speaking and writing the language well. it just happens that my psle malay paper was easy. heh. gosh and i am not even totally malay, i'm probably excused from, urm, being immuned to the language and stuff. goodness, some classmates of mine would like look at me in disgust when i told them i don't know some customs and traditions and when i told them about my chinese or arab or indonesian roots, they would go like,"alamak, never say earlier, we wouldn't suan you.." heh. one word: WHATEVER!!! i am sooo jealous of sunny and pei fen.. i mean geez they are soo in love with each other.. :D:D n they are planning to get married in 2 yrs time, by which sanie would have finished his ns and his c.c.(cybercafe) business would be flourishing like mad. heh. and pei fen's already going for islam-convert classes and stuff.. heh. and now we are discussing her name... =b some people are just so lucky to find the right people to trust their hearts with and thus beleive that love isn't an illusion but something real.. as for me, i still have got a lot to discover. heh. i really wanna bake that chocolate cheesecake for mir today but then tt stupid maid of mine lost my bakery book and i cannot find the recipe and over the web, they all use wine. yahoo looks funnier today. i think the owner revamped the web or its just my eye going all gooey cos of lack of sleep or sth. heh. i found it!! diabetic choc cheesecake. tt way i can eat it without feeling guilty. heh. who says an art student can't try her luck in bakery? maybe imma take some pix of the production of my lovely cuisine. heh. but first stop: getting ingredients. so urm, tahz?


died-ed at 10:28 am
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Saturday, November 01, 2003

yesterday was halloween. heh.

[ edit]:

heh. I IMPROVED!!!!!!!! got 27th position out of 44.. i got position number 36 last semester. soz, yeah. heh. was happy larh. heehee.. i love the food i ate this evening. chicken rice and takoyaki and a slice of peanut pancake. heh. it feels so weird breaking my fast without momma or daddy ard. watched uptown girls just now.. its really touching. soz, go watch it!

[ /edit ].


i didn't even scare the wits out of anyone. heh. i don't celebrate halloween anyway, just like the idea. heh. 'cos if singapore celebrates halloween, kids would get a hell load of sweets. i mean flats have a range of 4 floors all the way to the maximum of 30 floors. heh. and one floor has a minimum of at least 10 flats. and each flat will give 2 candy bars, at least. and then do your own calculation. heh. kids would so require huge pillow cases. bleahz. anyway, the day i thought i would be doomed, isn't doomed afterall. :D my parents wouldn't be able to take my report book with me (and i kept making them feel guilty about it by "tomorrow, the whole school's getting their report cards with their parents. the whole school but me.. poor me..". heh.) cos they would be at k.l. for don't know what reason. and that spoilt brat sister of mine has tagged along! yeay. so now we are arguing about what to eat for buka later on. heh. maggie, or ask bibik to chow in some cash for pizza, or go the mosque or get sth from the 5 coffeeshops available at my neighbourhood. and now i am craving some spring chicken. heh. i am blardie lazie now and i am amazed on how weirdly the time is whenever i blog. grrrrrrr. imma download my girl and my girl 2. the book was fantastic. :D sue me, i don't care. bleahz. and omg. when i typed in the title and searched. i got nothing but porn. arghz. i hate downloading, at times.


died-ed at 10:06 am
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Friday, October 31, 2003

we have to break up.

[ edit ]:

heh. i may have lost my bf today but i certainly didn't let that deprive me from having fun. apart from this morning's sex ed and "learning activities", the day was quite awlright. went to hg mall, after god-knows how many decades, with lynn, yaya n mir and urm half of lynn's bf. bleahz. met valerie at the lib. heh. she hasn't changed a bit. still tt sweet, cute, intelligent-looking girl that i knew 2 yrs ago. heehee. and nabilah atika too.. heh. but she's not cute soz urm, no comments. bleahz. so maybe imma get that colour phone i want for abt 50 bucks and mir's gonna get one of them colour phones too. kewl, kewl promotion. soz anyway, my parents aren't gonna go to school to take my report book with me. i called mr yeo and instead, i can go and pick it up on my own. yeay yeay yeay and YEAY! hehx. so imma, urm, gonna go to terawih now.

sarah's right, i don't need to have a bf to be happy. no use crying over a guy who won't forgive you for that one pathetic mistake. because he doesn't love you. and mr micheal's part of the sex ed is totally enriching.. "ways to dump a person..." heh.

[ /edit ].


on our 1st month. thank god its not the first year. i apologized and he was being an ultimate jerk. filled with guilt.. and he's filled with rage. what can i do? he wants to part. i can't force love. oh well, got tiger to console me.


died-ed at 6:34 am
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Thursday, October 30, 2003

skipped school againz.

i so gotta start missing my schoolmates already. but cannot lar, too obsessed with my bed and tucking in until the sun wakes me up from dreamland. heh. anyway, today's post-exam activity would be some sports and games and some foot talk(wth?) so i wouldn't be missing anything, even if it means some fun. bleahz. had the weirdest dream since i can recall. and i shall not describe it here even though its still crystal in my head. its just too weird. and urm, icky. haish, there's so little people online. the poly people are busy studying for the exams, the jc people are studying for their a's and stuff, my friends are in school and my uncles are urm, God knows what they are doing. hehx. we're gonna break fast at my gram's this evening so yeah.. but daddy wouldn't let us skip terawih because tonight is don't which ustadz. and he said that the ustadz read the surah with passion, very nice. and that means very long. arghz. i want that apollo(sp?) bag! arghh. an effing 79$ for that kewl stuff. ugh ugh ugh. where to get the money??? arghz. kk.. now my maid and mir are like talking about dreams and how not to sleep after sahur. hehx. i MUST go to school tomorrow.. MUST I SAY!!! hehx. everyone's getting their report books today or tomorrow.. and they don't need their parents to be at their school to do so. as for mine, its on saturday, WITH MY PARENTS. which is probably why i dread going to tt school of mine, esp ard this time of the year. cos im sooo gonna be doomed.


died-ed at 9:03 am
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Wednesday, October 29, 2003

sop's in habbo. heh

[ edit ] :

heh. went out with sop just now. he was soooo shy. heehee.. cute. =b so got myself a new pouch *bleahz* and took some sticker prints with him and mir. heh. one print mir look sooooooooo "bagai bulan kesiangan" (translation: very pale) heh. i must practice my peribahasa already. mly o's are like a week and a couple of days away. yikes. so he spent a lot of money on pants and shirt. but i didn't mind staying at that lil shop just now.. cos the assistant salesman was sooooo cute!! heh. was checking him out and he kept looking up and catch my eye and i would have to look away, shyly.. heehee.. enough already. heh. its just another guy, compared to MY DAHLING. :D saw shafiqah at the mosque just now.. she looked so sweet in tudung. she was about to talk to me when lynn and mir kept on interrupting. bleahz. so imma talk to her tomorrow or stg. daddy's gonna get the a-drive fixed so maybe i won't be able to use the computer till later. *wails!!!* but nvm, i shall prevail! heh. dear dear didn't have to work just now.. i chatted with him for a while and now waiting for his call so that i can talk to him all night or something and sleep during the talks or the sports and games tomorrow at school. or even better, don't go to school. argh. must make a point to go to tadarus already. *guilt written all over my face* lin shan's birthday is coming. gotta make her those graffiti stickers that she absolutely love. and oh, add a message. arghz. she better not read this entry!

faizal: the scrollbar okay marhz?

[ /edit ]


mir has got this habbo epidemic going on in singapore, i guess.. heh. now sop's in habbo, making a room.. bleahz. arghh. he is gonna have a room. i wanna make one too. heehee.anyways.....

NEW LAYOUT!!! did this thang last night, with a lil help from sop and the layout a lil help from rachel.. thanks u guys.. *kiShEs the boTh of thEm, uRm, SimulTanEoUSly* bleah. i got the gal pix from shan, who has it as her disp pix i guess. now, whilst the rest of the school is at sentosa, having fun and preparing for mrs lim's farewell party, i am sitting here, chatting with sop and shafiqah, playing habbo at some room, halloween to be exact. and i still can't figure out how to sit on those floating pumpkins. k soz imma help shafiqah with her psp7 now. so imma update this later. hehx. soo gonna meet sop. :D


died-ed at 9:34 am
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Tuesday, October 28, 2003

peeling potatoes

heh. mir was about to peel potatoes next to me, at the "computer shack". heh. i gave it a name to our pathetic 'lil corner, so yeah. =b i absolutely hate it when she closes the window of her hotmail account without signing out because then i would have to go thru the process of signing out for her and then sign in as me. arghh.. so anyway, helped her a 'lil on her new blogsite, called pink or lil meer.. heh. i love her taggie's colour. and its pinkeh too. buttinsky. bleahz. soz this morning i was playing habbo hotel and then i went into this room filled with racists who cannot stop dissing asians.. especially chinese. gosh i got so mad, i dissed the whole room and got myself kicked out. lol. and then i was complaining to sop and then suddenly he asked me out, so yeah. soz tomorrow we are gonna go to far east, againz. heehee.. and take some sticker photos.. or sth.. heh. went to tadarus. wore the wrong pants and got leg cramps the whole 2 hrs. sheesh. and then did some grocery shopping with mir. and now she's peeling potatoes for her mashed potatoes thang. all the time i was grocery shopping was msging sop and had a food war with him for a while. heh. ramadhan food war.. :D:D:D:D:D:D an hour left! yeay!


died-ed at 5:30 pm
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Monday, October 27, 2003

forked tongue. wth.?

today is the starting of the fasting month(last night actually but yeah) and its like an hour left before i can devour bread and chicken. :D:D anyway, i woke up this morning, had my breakfast-cum-lunch and then went to sleep for 20 mins, of which people won't stop sending the same "happy fasting" sms-es as they all don't wanna go back to sleep because of whatever reason, leaving me as their last resort to bug. and i was someone who actually wanted to sleep for a while. ugh. -relax. i'm fasting!- but i guess whoever who's reading this get what i am trying to say. and urm, convey. =b so when i couldnt sleep i got ready for school early, read the Qur'an and then used the computer for a while. there's this guy from the net who saw one of my pictures sticking my tongue out and he thought i forked my tongue gee.. soz anyway, school was a drag. didn't do anything much. went through the stupid a-maths paper which i failed and do not wish to discuss how freakingly good i am at doing it. heh. and i passed geog (!!!!) 37/50.. weewits.. and i used to get 3/25 for my tests. hehx. blood and sweat man.. blood and sweat.. failed ss though. bleahz. passed both english papers, b3 for an overall grade. and then during my free periods, i called home and told mir to call me back and we chatted whilst i was in clz with a tchr and stuff. so, yeah. hehx.

after school i coincided with mir to meet up with yaya and the three of us went to far east to do some shitty window shopping. and then took some stickers, which again, yaya didn't allow me to "post it over the internet".. heh. yaya had this balloon thang with her, you know, the magicians kinda thang.. yeah and we were like playing it in the NEL and then then it burst at the other mrt line, which i do not give a damn what line it is. bleahz. one thing i do not like about far east is its abundance of cafes, restauriez and such. bleah. and the chinese restaurants smelled like -eww- *no offense*.. yeah and we saw this cute nigga and his blonde white girlfriend and his nigga friend and his girlfriend's lil bro. damn kewl. gosh i wanna rosbud my hair too! *imagines myself with rosebudded hair*.. and on our way homezeh, in the train(north south line.. thankiez yaya!!) we saw.. *kak hanisah* aka my brother's girlfriend. and i was quite friendly to her. hehx. bleah. i mean amoungst the three of us, i salam-ed first. chet. big deal. heh. and she remembers mir's birthday. ugh. gaaaaaaaaaaaaahz. so imma have a 2-day break.. and rot at home on wednesday when the rest of my classmates will be having fun at SENTOSA. arghhh. i gotta get over it. bleahz.


**and oh, to see that "forked" tongue of mine, click here


died-ed at 5:43 pm
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